Over time, I arrived at two conclusions about unsolicited advice.- Some people think out loud. They want to talk about their problems in order to see them clearly. They will find their own solution and only need a listener to listen to them.
- Some people like to moan. They want to talk about their troubles because they want sympathy. They are not looking for a solution.
Now, I mostly try to be quiet and only listen to the talkers who need to talk out their dilemma. The moaners? I try to change the subject or make a quick getaway.
Don't you dislike when someone moans and groans and say yes but to everything you say to do?
ReplyDeletesandie
Just not worth the effort, is it?
DeleteYou hit the nail on the head.
ReplyDeleteYou said it right. Most people just like to vent. Chances are the venters don't listen to advice anyhoo! Good idea to save your breath :)
ReplyDeleteThat's so true - even if someone asks for advice they hardly ever follow it...
ReplyDeleteI completely relate to everything you said. I too am a fixer and I too learned the same lesson. Writing a blog that offers advice and suggestions is a way I get my fixin' needs met.
ReplyDeleteJagoda
Clever woman. I never considered the therapeutic aspect of writing unsolicited advice on my blog.
DeleteI like to solve the problem too. But, really, what do I know?! I agree w/ Jagoda, blogging helps us get out views out without anyone really asking!
ReplyDeletefrom The Dugout
I know what you mean, Elizabeth. Over the years, I've had to learn to tell when my wife is just venting, and when she's actually asking for my input on something. I too used to be full of advice for people, but I've learned to keep my ears open, my mouth closed, and either wait for a request for advice, or ask if my advice is sought. Most of the time... :)
ReplyDeleteYes, I try to keep my mouth shut most of the time (okay at least some of the time).
DeleteGreat advice. Some people can't help but give advice and opinions even when you don't wish to hear it.
ReplyDeleteGlad you gave this unsolicited advice! But sometimes, if you feel you need to speak, it's usually for the best to do so, even if the benefits for having done so probably won't be evident to you. Writer’s Mark
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading my unsolicited advice. Maybe it will have benefits for you and me.
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