One Glorious Ambition

Yes, one glorious ambition, but what is it?  That is what Dorothea Dix wondered for many years until she discovered her calling among "the least of these" as she called them. Dix was instrumental in raising public awareness about the poor treatment of the mentally handicapped in the U.S., and eventually Europe, in the 1800s.

In Jane Kirkpatrick's book One Glorious Ambition: The Compassionate Crusade of Dorothea Dix, we are immersed in the mind and heart of Dix, a woman who never felt like she accomplished enough. Kirkpatrick blends fact and fiction to tell us about a woman who was a successful teacher, actually running her own school, and published author by the age of 20. She went on to become the friend of politicians and presidents as she worked tirelessly to relieve the suffering of the mentally ill.

Dix's father was abusive, her mother probably suffered from some form of mental illness, and Dix tried her best as a child to nurture her two younger brothers. Her father's family was wealthy and well-regarded, but he was estranged from them so Dorothea's family lived in poverty. These early influences formed Dix into the woman she became. A woman searching for a loving family to accept her as she was. A woman who needed to succeed because she felt she failed to rescue her brothers from their difficult childhood. A woman who needed to keep moving, keep striving like a "spinning top" and never stop because she was afraid if she stopped and thought for too long, she might become mentally ill like her mother.

The book was painful to read at times. Dix's desire to acquire family leads her to behave awkwardly and strive too hard, which resulted in people pushing her away. When after a struggle of many years the mental health bill she wrote and tried to help pass into law failed, Dix felt like she failed. She took the loss personally, almost as a rejection of her.

Dix appears to be a woman who knew and loved God, but did she trust Him and rely on Him to accomplish His will in His way? I don't think so. Her drive, persistence, and stubbornness, which were instrumental in achieving the wonderful breakthroughs in the care of the mentally needy that occurred in her lifetime, were also her worst enemies. She was unable to compromise or see another's point of view. She felt her goals needed to be achieved her way, and her way only.

Looking at the book's cover, you might expect a light, enjoyable semi-biographical novel, but that is not the case. The book paints a true picture of a dedicated woman with great gifts and great flaws.

One Glorious Ambition: The Compassionate Crusade of Dorothea Dix by Jane Kirkpatrick
WaterBrook Press, 2013
Fiction/Historical, 382 pages

WaterBrook Press provided a free copy of this book for review. The opinions stated are my own. 

What Does it Take to be a Mentor?

Recently, while we were vacationing with our family and my daughter's new in-laws, her mother-in-law shared how she believes the Lord wants her to become more involved in mentoring younger women.

Her dilemma is that she hopes to be moving this year and does not know if she should begin mentoring women in her present church or wait until she moves and establishes relationships with a new group of women.

My daughter has mentored two teen girls over the last two or three years and two of my sons have sought mentors. I have observed several things.

• A mentor has to be willing to commit their time. There is no way to mentor without meeting together regularly. I suppose this can also be done via telephone or email. However, there seems to be something about communicating face-to-face that encourages trust and bonding.
• Praying for your mentored person is a necessary component of the relationship. It is easy for us to respond with our own advice, but God's council could be very different.
• Let them talk. A few years ago I met with a young homeschool mom who wanted advice regarding how to organize her homeschool day and still maintain a reasonably clean home. As we met and spoke for several hours over coffee, it became apparent that her real need was help with the relationship between she and her husband. If I had immediately charged in and began giving advice, she might never have gotten to the root of the problem she really needed help with.
• Be consistent. If you plan to meet every week, set the time aside and treat it as an unbreakable date otherwise every life interruption becomes a reason not to meet and the relationship falls apart.
• Treat your mentoree with respect. They might be decades younger than you or just a few years, but that does not make you a life expert. A mentor is a guide, a support, and an encourager, not a prophet from on high.

My daughter continues to mentor a high school student, her other mentoree has gone on to college. Both of these lovely young women contributed toward making her wedding day special by assisting with various small tasks.

My sons? Not so much success. The men they met with, men they respected and admired did not follow through for very long. Meetings were cancelled and my sons were not contacted. They both felt rejected and undervalued. The saddest part is that my sons felt these were both strong men of faith who they hoped would help guide them in their walk with Christ. I continue to pray for committed mentors for all three of my sons because while parents are great, being able to talk to another mature adult with a different perspective is invaluable.

Linking up with Kate at Teaching What is Good











Image: photostock/freedigitalphotos.net

Submerged

Our mistakes have a way of coming back to haunt us even when we've changed.  Bailey Craig in Dani Pettrey's book Submerged discovered this the hard way.

Bailey was a wild child as a teen, sleeping with any boy who wanted her.  Abandoned by her mother, Bailey lived with her aunt in Alaska.  Despite her aunt's love and support, Bailey felt deeply wounded by her mother's abandonment and looked for love and acceptance anywhere she could find it.

She left wreckage in her wake.  Her first boyfriend, Cole, was one of those pieces of wreckage.

When Bailey's aunt dies, she has to return to Alaska to sell her aunt's business.  She dreads returning because she doesn't want to face Cole who was a good friend and she doesn't want to endure the knowing looks and unkind comments from others in the small Alaska town who knew the kind of girl she was.

The kind of girl she was.  Bailey's a new person now.  She became a believer in Jesus while she was in college and changed her lifestyle.  And now as a college professor and a Christian, she is respected by her friends and colleagues in Oregon.  Going back to Alaska to face her past is not something she ever envisioned doing.

After learning her aunt's death in a plane crash was not accidental, Bailey is compelled to stay in Alaska to unravel the clues her aunt left that can explain why she and several more people were killed.  The longer Bailey stays, she discovers that not only has God forgiven her for her past, but so has Cole.

Submerged is about transitions and forgiveness set against the backdrop of Alaska in the summertime.  Dani Pettrey weaves information about Alaska's Russian heritage into a contemporary story of murder, greed and power-seeking.  Not to mention skin-diving, treasure-hunting and the search for the last descendants of the Romanov dynasty.

Bailey is a complicated woman still filled with unhappiness and hurt. Although she knows she is loved and forgiven by God, she has difficulty accepting that love and forgiveness.  The character of Bailey is a person-type with whom many of us can identify.  Her struggle for wholeness is universal.
  
There are elements of predictable romance in the book, but by not brushing over Bailey's struggle with believing she is genuinely forgiven and a new woman in Christ and not providing easy solutions, Pettrey gives the book authenticity and weight.

Submerged is absorbing summer reading, not fluffy, and particularly interesting because of the focus on Russian Alaska history.  It is the first book in the Alaskan Courage series.  Pettrey introduces us to many other characters who I think will be the lead players in subsequent entries in the series.


Submerged by Dani Pettrey
Bethany House Publishers, 2012
Christian Fiction, 313 pages
Bethany House Publishers provided a free copy of Submerged for review. The opinions stated are my own.

Uncovering Mold

This is our bathroom.  Notice the lack of bathtub and wall?  Insidious mold was growing behind the shower surround, you know that thing that goes around your bathtub?  

We executed a temporary repair job a few years ago for the same problem, but had obviously waited too long before implementing a permanent solution because the mold came back with a vengeance.  So here we go again, the bathroom is torn up and getting remodeled.


 



It seems like we treat  our problems like this.  If everything looks fine on the surface, we just ignore the niggling hints that there is something wrong underneath and keep singing in the shower.

Like I said, we knew the previous repair was only temporary, but we left it alone too long, the problem got bigger and bigger and we arrived at the point where we had to strip the wall back to the cinder blocks.

Ignoring a problem doesn't make it go away and implementing a temporary repair is just that, temporary.  Sometimes you have to do the hard work of digging below the surface to get to the root of a problem.

• Are your finances a mess?  You might need to examine your expenditures to uncover where all the money is going.  
• Do you have a troubled relationship?  Don't keep shifting the blame on the other person, examine your own heart, motives and actions. 
• Are you gaining weight, or having trouble eating healthfully?  Don't deceive yourself, assess what you're eating, how much you're eating and when you're eating.  You'll likely find some answers.

In order to transition to a life of wholeness, health and peace, we need to examine honestly the unhealthy areas in our lives and deal with them by initiating changes.  Even when they're messy.  Even when they're inconvenient.  Even when they're hard.  Even when it hurts.


And while it's great to research and talk to other people about the best way to handle the problem, remember in the end that their solution is probably not going to be your solution.  Everyone has diverse circumstances. 

As a Christian, my solution begins by going to God and asking for help because effecting radical change is difficult and sometimes impossible on my own.  And quite likely the way He leads me is going to be different than the way He leads someone else.  However it happens, the repair work may still be hard, and others might judge and criticize my methods and choices, but at least I know I'm doing it the way He wants me to.

So, where is your mold?  Are you willing to strip your life down to the cinder blocks to find the truth and make changes?

Will I be the Hero or the Villain?

Welcome to Five Minute Friday.  Today's word is Story

Our lives are a story, part of a book being written.  A book that will end in eternity.  We each are a character in this long story that stretches throughout time, and in our part of the story, we are the main character.

Or so we think.

Image source

We are actually part of an ensemble cast of characters.  The actions of one person in our story is never suspended in isolation.  Each person's decisions, words and actions affect the other characters.

My story touches my family, my friends, my neighbors, my community and my world.  What I do can affect their story.  Will I be a hero or a villain in their story?

But I don't really write my story alone, I am a co-author with the God who created me and already knows how my story will play out.  I exist in the story world He created for me, but He does not move and manipulate me like a normal author does in the book he writes.

My Author gives His characters free will.  We make our choices and move through the plot of life.  We have a better chance of being the hero rather than the villain, though, if we let the Perfect Author take control of the story and lead us through the plot twists and turns until we reach the conclusion.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat on the prompt: “Story” with no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community.

Breaking Up is Hard To Do

A special Reflections Post on the Blogging From A to Z Challenge April 2012

It was like falling violently in love and being dumped abruptly in the same month. The rush, the wonder, the excitement, dreaming about what to write, composing a masterful post, publishing it on time, reveling in the comments. So satisfying, so fulfilling.  Then ... it was over.

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What do I do?  I've forgotten how to write without a letter of the alphabet to guide my thinking.  Who am I?  What is my blog usually about anyway?  Where do I go from here?  I feel so lost, so alone, so abandoned, so used.

The newness of the relationship was so exhilarating. The adrenaline rush, unmatchable.  Fresh, new, unknown blogs to read, 1,700 from which to choose.  I was giddy from the possibilities.

But like any new relationship  I eventually discovered little quirks that displeased,  me such as private blogs (how do you expect me to read you?), word verification (I can't always understand you), content which was sometimes offensive (all I wanted was a pure, beautiful relationship), the inability to leave comments (how can we get to know each other if we don't communicate?), very long posts (it's true, I was guilty of this too, my darling).

Despite the abrupt end to our wild and stimulating relationship, I gained so much.  You opened up a whole new world for me.  I met so many new people, many of whom I hope will still be my friends even though you and I are no longer together.

New opportunities, such an unexpected boon.  Because of you I will be reviewing books on my blog.  I'm thrilled to read different books and now I can review them so that the world will know them too.  Would this have happened without you?  I don't know, but you have opened up my world.

What would I change about you if I could?  Oh my beloved, I didn't want you to sell me things.  I turned away from you when I recognized your motive.  I wanted a love affair not a sales meeting.  That made me feel so used, so defiled.

And, my beloved, though it was so addictive being with you everyday, I realized that I couldn't let you consume me anymore.  There is a whole life still to be lived away from the keyboard, away from the alphabet, away from you.  But, maybe we can meet again next year?

(Want to read some of the other blogs in the Challenge?  Click here.)

Ain't Nothing Like the Real Thing

My mind usually has a song going through it.  I would like to say it's the soundtrack of my life, but I hope not because one of the songs that frequents my brain is, I Shot the Sheriff.

When the song, Ain't Nothing Like the Real Thing, popped into my head I began considering what it was about, and that was love of course, since that's the theme of so many pop songs old and new.

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Then I was struck by the idea of real also meaning genuine and I how I have begun seek what is genuine.  I want genuine friends, a genuine walk with God, genuine relationships.

I'm tired of the superficiality of so many interactions in my life.  I would like to strike the word "Fine," from my vocabulary.  I would like to finally and completely turn my self over to my God with a sincere heart.   I would like to know what is genuinely troubling my family, my friends....


Out of time again.

Welcome to Five Minute Friday when we spend five minutes writing about the word prompt presented by The Gypsy Mama without editing or over thinking.
Please link back here to share what you've written, visit the person who linked before you, leave an encouraging comment and invite others to join in.